know, it sucks.
Having to alter your entire way of life overnight can be terribly disorientating— the big ol’ matrix urging us to constantly be active has suddenly shapeshifted into mandatory lockdowns, quarantines and curfews.
Even more, in a bizarre twist worthy of an alternative comic book timeline, chilling at home has become a civic duty.
But like all duties, as necessary and virtuous (in this case even existential) as they may be, they usually take a toll. And let’s face it – going full Inquisition on your neighbours to make sure they respect the rules of the quarantine can only be amusing for so long.
It’s not just the vast quantities of time we suddenly seem to possess. Being confined to a room, forced to endure the constant company of loved ones is enough to drive even the Dalai Lamas amongst us (yeah I know, not me) to the brink of sanity.
If we are to survive this biblical ordeal without losing all of our marbles to folding underwear in interesting new ways, we are in desperate need of some quality digital escapism. A substitute of what we are missing that makes us forget we are missing it at all.
I know you probably won’t believe this, but That Anxious Dude’s got just the thing.
In fact, I’ve made a whole list, so you don’t have to wander around the web aimlessly, spending all that time that you don’t really…
Here’s some of the cool stuff you can do while being cooped up:
If you are from a city that comes alive in the summer after a long winter sleep, you’re probably feeling like you’ve been hit twice as hard by the quarantine. Suddenly there’s no going out. Suddenly there’s no partying.
Or is there?
I’m from Berlin myself, and if there’s one thing we’re kinda good at, it’s partying. Which means the clubbing goes on, even during a lockdown.
United We Stream is a nifty platform that airs live DJ performances from the city’s most eminent techno clubs and they do it every — single — night.
CHILL IN A MUSEUM
When I was a teenager and had to visit museums with school, I thought they were chambers of torture, designed to kill you with strategically placed assaults of boredom.
These days I’m willing to elbow a lot of brats if it gets me closer to a marble bust of Caligula.
Luckily for those kids, Travel and Leisure Mag assembled a list of 12 prestigious houses of heritage that offer virtual tours, during which you can get lost for hours without a cranky crowd blocking your view of David’s supremely toned buttocks.
(Be sure to find the icon of the little orange street view guy on the page, otherwise you’ll just be staring at a couple of random pictures feeling like a complete tool, which is what I went through: These 12 Famous Museums Offer Virtual Tours You Can Take on Your Couch
GO TO A BAR
God I miss drinking.
I mean drinking with friends. In an establishment. Not the kind of drinking where you get crazy sloshed alone behind a keyboard, wearing PJs for 11 hours straight. (Well at least it made me realise one thing- I’m no Hemingway.)
It turns out that thanks to some very cool people we can still have a drinkie in a social setting. The #staythefuckathome is a virtual bar where you can hang out with folks who enjoy a hearty night cap.
There’s many different inns to choose from, so if you want do to a pub crawl nobody is going to stop you, although maybe they should: staythefuckhome.bar
I realise this is probably going to leave you shell shocked, but I’m not really into classical music. I could’t tell a Ludwig Von from a Hans Zi (-mmer).
Having said that, two days ago I stumbled upon the link of the Berlin Philharmonic, which is currently handing out free passes for their concert streams, and I think I’ve positively changed my mind.
The fancy pants people among you probably know this already, but the orchestra is considered to be one of the best in the world, so put your Primark jogging bottoms away, pour the beer into a glass for a change, and chill out to the beats of a German dude named Johann: The Digital Concert Hall now free for everyone | Berliner Philharmoniker
A FILM FESTIVAL
Short films are an often overlooked format that you need to get with asap, especially if you call yourself a cinephile (and even if you call yourself something else).
Talking Shorts Magazine is hosting a finely curated short film festival on the very appropriate theme of, you guessed it — dystopia. Every week, seven shorts from around the globe get published, and every week you can vote for the one you think is best.
All the proceeds go to Médecins Sans Frontières as well as to a host of underfunded cultural institutions: My Darling Quarantine Short Film Festival
Judging by my Instagram feed there’s a bunch of unfortunate souls out there who really can’t seem to warm up to the idea of a perfectly decent quarantine. They just have to do something.
For these little urban achievers, a bunch of Ivy League Schools offer more than a 450 free online courses that have been diligently compiled by the FreeCodeCamp.
You can learn how to code, earn a decent wage during the imminent recession and send me some gratitude cheese, because I basically made you into the successful person you are now: Here are 450 Ivy League courses you can take online right now for free
Honourable mentions for the perpetually unsatisfied:
at least until the cold rears its ugly head again, Berlin is turning itself into a series of endless open air festivals and parties.Our little hangout reflects this festive mood, at least on the outside. If you were just a random person walking by, you would have seen two mates comfortably sharing a bottle, drinking out of paper cups, chatting away and laughing. It would all look like an uplifting scene from a European indie film.
The truth however, is different. Laurie is my friend, yes, and what’s coming out of my mouth is real laughter, but the unpleasant feeling bouncing around my skull is one of deep discomfort. The truth is I’d rather be anywhere else right now. It’s not that anything bad happened between the two of us, like a pissing contest’s gone sour just moments ago… I’ve known Laurie for almost 5 years and during that time we’ve never even had as much as a disagreement.
at least until the cold rears its ugly head again, Berlin is turning itself into a series of endless open air festivals and parties.
Our little hangout reflects this festive mood, at least on the outside.
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